You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.

-Mary Oliver

Wednesday 17 December 2008

Home again

I'm not sure why it is that I have so much trouble blogging when I'm home in Minneapolis. I'm halfway through my time back now, and life has settled (as much as it can) into a comfortable rhythm of work and play. Sometimes I start to feel a little panicked, when I look at my list of "people to see" and realise there's no way I'll get to them all, or to get to them all as much as I'd like, but far be it from me to complain about popularity (though I'm tempted).

It's been really lovely to reconnect with people. I'm struck how we all look the same, but different. There's something in the bearing, in the way of expressing ourselves, that's progressed from the last time we spoke. Dare I say it - some kind of maturity. Almost like we're growing up.

But then, the more things change, the more they stay the same. I'm working at Dunn's again, which is a blessing, and I'm able to appreciate it because I know I'm not here for long. That's the case with Minneapolis, as well, to an extent - because I know I'm leaving again soon, I can truly enjoy the old routines and patterns without feeling as though I'm stuck in them.

And the more things stay the same, the more they change... Gem and Mark got married last weekend. My dear friend S has filed for divorce. Megan Smith nee Fee is pregnant. Landmarks change, businesses close, new friends are encountered, old friends move away.

But it's still home. Even as London is home, even as I have no base these days. It's good to be back.