You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.

-Mary Oliver

Wednesday 29 August 2007

Busy bee... but still sad

What I've Been Doing With Myself Since Wednesday:

Thursday:
Cycled to work, then cycled to Covent Garden for the August Thursday-night Covent Garden Night Food Market. Noplace does markets like London. I love 'em! Portobello, Camden, The Stables (I haven't even been to that one yet!), Spitalfields... there are many, and all are awesome. This one is no exception. Simon, Carrie, Niamh, and I all convened for dinner - Simon and I got Ghanaian food, Carrie and Niamh got Indian, and we huddled under parasoled picnic tables eating out of our little take-away dishes in the chill. And then we got organic mango-passionfruit-lime ice cream. And then I ate the Richest Most Chocolatey Brownie I Have Ever Eaten. Literally, as soon as I took my first bite my head snapped back with the power of the chocolate. Unbelievable. We love the Covent Garden Night Market. Tomorrow is the last night, and you'd better bet we'll be there.

After the Night Market and a beer, Simon, Niamh, her French flatmate Camille, and I all went and saw The Lives of Others. Phenomenal film. Best I've seen in a long while. And then I cycled home at 1130 at night for seven miles through central London, and didn't die. Go me.

Friday:
I took the bus into work because straightaway after work I was going to Waterloo station to catch a train to Hampshire. Went to Hampshire with Simon (Mr Jackson) and his friend James (Mr Read) to meet Jack (Mr Lakey) and Kevin (Mr Stott) at Jack's place of employ, the Gordon Brown Outdoor Educational Centre (no, not THAT Gordon Brown). What followed was an evening of revelry in the country, complete with a night walk through the woods with an impromptu exploration of an abandoned house and a premeditated exploration of an old underground air raid shelter. The former was fun. The latter was awesome. It was the darkest and quietest place I have ever been, and it made me feel like I didn't have a body, or like there was nothing except for my body. Or something. And I was sober. Super, super cool. Got to bed super, super late.

Saturday:
Simon had to leave, so the rest of us had a BBQ without him. Incredible food. Then I had to leave for work. Worked. Met up with Mr.s Lakey, Read, and Stott who had since come into London for the evening. Went and danced to soul music at Metro on Oxford Street. Didn't get home til 5am. Jack and Kevin squeezed into my single bed, James slept on the floor; I slept in Rebecca's room.

Sunday:
Got up early to make the boys breakfast. Then they went out exploring while I took a shower and tried to suck energy back into my de-energised body. Carrie and I met up with them at three to go to the Notting Hill Carnival, which is apparently the biggest street carnival in Europe. Or something. It's West Indies themed, which means lots of Steel bands, lots of really really loud, great music, lots of fantastic food, lots of floats and people in crazy colourful costumes; and it was in London, which means lots and lots of police, and lots and lots of really, really drunk people. We went on "Kid's Day," so it wasn't too bad. Cool sights of the day included:
  • a troupe of about 12 reeeeally good rollerskaters that came outta nowhere and went flying down Portobello road
  • impromptu capoeria circle
  • people hanging out of windows to watch the carnival
  • a lady handing out baby wipes outside some seriously sketchy port-a-potties
  • more speakers than I have ever seen
  • a group of 15yearolds dressed as superheroes
  • music stages playing music so loudly it made my vision vibrate (no joke)

and, my personal favorite,

  • two eighty-year-old ladies gettin' down to the funky beats of passing floats. That will be me and Janna in fifty years, mark my words.

After a couple of hours of that we were plumb wore out, so we hung out and walked around Kensington Gardens in the fading light. Then the boys went home to their respective countryside abodes, and Carrie and I saw Knocked Up. I'm a pussy; I totally cried when she gave birth. And it made me want to have a baby in a way I never have before, and it made me miss my parents, and have so much appreciation and awe for what they went through. Not bad for a summer romantic comedy, huh. Went home, slept eleven hours.

Monday:
Woke up with a headcold. Shit. But it was a bank holiday! No work! Hooray! Called Gemma (Happy Birthday, my love!), which made me a little sad. I miss her terribly. It's been a really really long time. To make myself feel better, I took myself out to lunch to my new favorite place, Graceland, which is a little cafe/lunch spot with big windows, wood tables, and high ceilings that's a 7min walk from my house. You will be able to find me there every weekend from now on. It's great. Came home to a quiet afternoon of chats with Natali, painting more paintings, and lounging around. Did some quarter-hearted house-hunting online. Watched Notes on a Scandal with Carrie...

And then got really sad again. Was sad all that night, and then all day yesterday. Luckily Niamh called to see if I wanted to come over for dinner, so I ended up spending the rest of the day and night with her, which was really lovely. I'm wearing one of her dresses to work today. She also gave me lots of new clothes. (I've resolved to start dressing cooler. Rebecca and Natali in particular will henceforward be my style gurus.)

Today, generally speaking, has been better. Still have the headcold and am pretty low-energy, but feel more in control, in a way. One thing that's been helpful is I've decided that tonight I'm going to prom - short for promenade, and it essentially means getting rush tickets to a classical music performance at Prince Albert Hall. Hopefully Carrie will be joining me, but even if she doesn't, ain't nothing wrong with a little solo classical concert going.

**Addendum**

The concert at Prince Albert Hall was awesome. The first piece was Strauss' Also Spoke Zarasthura, better known as the theme from 2001: A Space Odyssey, and boy, did I ever get the goosebumps!

duuun.... duuuun.... duuuun........... DUN DUUUUN! (dundundundundundundundundundun)

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