Ugh.

Sickness is coming on. Good thing I didn't watch the Oscars last night. As it was, I had trouble sleeping and today I'm tired and snotty and gross. Ugh. Three days until end of term...

Sunday Sunday, so good to me

Today is the most incredible day. It's beautiful spring-sunny, and I'm meandering around one of my favorite neighborhoods in East London, doing some new-favourite and some old-favourite things. For example: salted beef bagel sandwich on Brick Lane (brand-spankin-new favourite); coffee at 157 Brick Lane (newish favourite); overpriced cupcake on Columbia Street (new favourite); walking up and down and buying flowers at Columbia Flower Market (my favourite thing for months now). Everything is making me smile and also want to weep a little. (This is probably because I'm also super tired due to a late birthday party last night.) It's just one of those so-beautiful-it's-a-little-melancholy days.

I also walked past the Rich Mix Cinema and saw that they're BROADCASTING THE OSCARS LIVE tonight FOR FREE from 10pm to 5am. "Dress to impress." I cannot tell you how tempted I am. Will I willfully ignore the fact that I have a particularly long day tomorrow to indulge my Oscar obsession? We shall see...

We're fast approaching the end of term now, which is my lame-o, completely invalid excuse for not writing much of late. The past ten days since my last entry have seen a 5 hour Valentine's Day lunch with Erin, Isabel landing her front handspring (!!!!!!!!!!!!), further consolidation of Paris plans (trip scheduled from 13th-16th March), and some really great creation work in school. I'm performing in two pieces for our end-of-term presentation on Thursday (one tragic chorus and one grotesque piece), both of which I'm really happy with and excited to show. There's also a possibility I'll be performing my song.

Your song? What song?

As part of Voice class this term, everyone has written a song. They came out of exercises where we'd explore vocal qualities of different environments or emotions, then freewrite, and then try to find melodies for the words through our natural vocal cadence. This past Wednesday, everyone performed what they'd come up with, and it was the most lovely, joyful thing to see and hear these very personal pieces of people set to music. Mine still needs a lot of work (it's currently at least two songs in one), but I love it to pieces, and I find myself singing it all the time, especially when I'm cycling. (Interestingly enough, it's when I'm on my bike that I find I have the most eureka moments in terms of songcrafting [with this piece, anyway].) So there's the possibility I'll be performing that on Thursday, too. We'll see.

For the moment, though, I'll just enjoy this moment, this day, and prepare for the insanity and the joyful chaos of the last week of term.

Wounds of love

The back of my right hand is covered in mysterious bruises that I'm sure I sustained during a solo exercise with Thomas in class yesterday where I repeatedly threw myself (or was thrown) onto acrobatic mats while reciting a text from Charles Mee's The Trojan Women 2.0. I have little freckle bruises on the insides of my forearms as a result of the half-hour impromptu volleyball game we played after class last night (also with Thomas! Thomas playing volleyball! Oh joy!). I am sore as sore can be from the poorly-attended Acro class on Monday, which meant an intense workout for the two of us who were there as we attempted handspring after handspring for seventy minutes straight.

The only thing that could make life better right now would be if I had managed to go to bed at a decent hour last night. As it is, it's pretty fucking great.

Content

Tonight, I come home to a house that is calm, clean, and quiet. Today has been a lovely day, smelling of spring, filled to the brim with buckwheat apple-cinnamon pancakes, sunshine walks, pizza ordered in, laughter, and Erin. We saw a man playing guitar under a tree as a paunchy Hasidic Jew jogged by, patches of crocuses and pointing daffodils, a young girl gathering flowers, people on bicycles, all bathed in a slanted golden light. Classical music erupted from old brownstones on hushed streets. Puppies and children were out in full force. And now, with tomorrow's lunch in the fridge and my contacts out, I'm soaked in the pleasant exhaustion of a slow Sunday well spent.

Nothin' but blue skies from now on...

It's a beautiful day. The cycle ride in this morning was lovely, and I'm feeling optimistic. Class the past couple of days have been great - working on songs with Simon in Voice, Viewpoints and Chorus work with Michael, Flocking in Butoh, and a very encouraging and exciting Creation last night - and this afternoon looks like it should be more of the same.

I'm absolutely loving this Chorus work, what little we've done of it. There's something so pleasurable in being a part of a group that moves as one while remaining many. It helps me to listen, and encourages me to find a level of unity and calm that eludes me more often when I'm alone onstage, or have to be a separate entity. But at the same time, I'm enjoying having the opportunity to move the chorus when I *am* a separate entity, when I am the speaker or the protagonist who faces the crowd. It's all very exciting, dynamic work. And it's joyful to feel that unity and connection in the group after these past weeks of Grotesque, which brought out the grotesque in all of us.

It's good to be back.

Now is the (warmish) winter of our (mild) discontent

I feel so listless these days, so vaguely frustrated and slightly ill at ease. I feel like complaining all the time, though I have no cause for complaint. I feel stuck, and unengaged, and boring, and bored. And I don't know why, and it's Driving. Me. Nuts.

Bleagh.

Maybe it's because Grotesque has been so difficult these past weeks. Maybe it's the midterm slump. Maybe it's because I've been working in the same small creation group for a month now (and though it's consistently been a wonderful group to work work with, that's a long time to spend working so closely with so few people), and our most recent presentation felt like a letdown to me - like we'd worked so hard for so long and thought we'd gotten somewhere but actually were still stuck with the same notes, the same obstacles, in the same rut. Maybe it's just the nature of the work - Grotesque is dark and pulls downwards, and Tragedy is dark and pulls downwards, and those are the two territories we're exploring this term. Maybe it's leftover angst from recent school politics. Maybe I'm premenstrual. Maybe I just have the blahs.

Blah, blah, blah.

In which case, no one can combat this ickiness other than me. Let's try with a handy-dandy list, entitled Things That Have Not Been Blah. Ready? Let's go.

Things That Have Not Been Blah

• Enchanted (with Cecile)
• The Mutt(on)/Lamb Rap with Erin
• Erin, upon learning that I'd also written several songs with Carrie, dubbing me the Timbaland of LISPA (AWESOME!)
• Mexican Night at our house (featuring homemade fajitas by Jed and Karim, guac and chips, Coronas with lime, tequila shots, and Desperado)
• No Country for Old Men
• The engrossing ongoing drama that is the Democratic delegate race
• My bangs
• My new, dark brown, knee-high, leather, pirate-superhero boots from Clark's that I got for £25!!!! (70% off! Yow!)
• Working on the Chorus in class yesterday - from Horse Racing Crowds to Watching the Titanic Sink
• Moving into a new theatrical territory in general - it was time to be done with Grotesque
• Little parcels of musical love in the post (THANK YOU, LIV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Ah. I feel a little better now. Fingers crossed ... I hope it sticks.

The eternal question

My life is not boring. Things are decent. I do stuff. Stuff happens.

So why can't I be bothered to write about it?!

Stuff and Things

It's official: I'm totally getting lazy on the blog-front. Apologies, both for that general transgression, and for this entry, which will be scattered and fraught with lists. You have been warned.

Stuff that's happened (or happening) that I think is worth mentioning:

• I spent all day Sunday on my own doing arty things. I saw an amazing physical theatre show by these guys that made me want to go to circus school. I saw an art exhibition about Sex and Censorship and managed to catch a live string trio concert while I was at it. I also saw The Savages.
• Also on Sunday, I was mistaken for a Londoner by a 60-something man. He was disappointed to learn I wasn't one, as he'd bet his wife of 30 years that I was. This is me tickled pink.
• Though its implementation is entirely contingent on visa concerns and dozens of others as-yet-unknown potentially mitigating factors, my British friend Alexander has invited me to join his theatre company after I graduate from LISPA. Who knows whether this will be able to happen, but just the offer itself is pretty exciting (not to mention flattering).
• Articles like this get me so excited and inspired about what's happening in America.
• We've been working on Great Speeches in class, and I've found this fascinating one from 1941. I don't know that I agree with it, but I certainly find it fun to work on.